sepetav's Statistics
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User Statistics
| User Level: | User | ||
| Contribution Points: | 680 | ||
| Total Joke Score: | 5,967 | ||
| Total Time Active: | 65 hours, 53 minutes | ||
Joke Statistics
| Total Jokes Submitted: | 90 | Live Jokes: | 35 | |
| Total Deleted Jokes (including duplicates): | 55 | Duplicate Jokes: | 20 | |
| Average Joke Score (All Jokes): | 66.30 | Average Joke Score (Exc. Deleted): | 170.49 | |
| Average Time Before Deletion: | 206,580m | |||
| Favourite Subcategory | Sex and shit > Incest (3) | |||
The best of sepetav's 35 jokes (View All).
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My best mate is entering the X-Factor this year and I wanted to give him all the help and support I can. So I killed his mum. |
 
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A man walks into a library. "Fuck me, it's busy in here today." |
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Joke
by sepetav in Illness and mortality - Suicide (+ 1 more) - Added: 4 years, 3 months ago - Current Score: 531.8
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I was watching the snooker earlier and Shaun Murphy was having a bit of trouble with the yellow. Or Ding Junhui as the commentators called him. |
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On BBC Sports Personality of the Year tonight Rebecca Adlington said: "I wouldn't be here if it wasn't for my parents." No shit. |
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Joke
by sepetav in Celebrities - Sports Personalities - Added: 4 years, 5 months ago - Current Score: 295
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I was lying in bed with my girlfriend, when she said I reminded her of a black man. "Why, is it because I've got a massive cock?" I asked. "No, it's cause I fucking hate you." |
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A recent survey shows that 20% of women have admitted to being the victim of domestic abuse. The other 80% of women wouldn't dare open their mouths. |
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Carlsberg don't do World Cup winners. So they sponsor the England team instead. |
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Joke
by sepetav in In The News - Sports Headlines - Added: 2 years, 11 months ago - Current Score: 121.2
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I was on a date last night and we were chatting about our careers. "Basically, I put monkeys into cages and bring them their meals three times a day," I said. "I've worked with some of them for so long I almost feel like they're human." "Ah, so you're a zookeeper," she replied. "No, I'm a policeman." |
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Ever since my 10-year-old daughter was kidnapped, gang-raped and then murdered by a group of black men last month, I've spent a lot of time thinking. But I still can't think of a good joke to post about it. |
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Joke
by sepetav in Illness and mortality - Death - Added: 4 years, 3 months ago - Current Score: 79.4
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After Tiki Gelana crashed into a wheelchair racer during the London Marathon, a lot of people have claimed that it was the last thing you wanted to happen during a marathon. I'm sure the people of Boston would disagree. |
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