Jokes under Illness and mortality > Therapy
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You know, John and I have been having some sexual problems" Linda told her friend.
That's amazing!" Mary replied, "So have Tom and I. We're thinking of going to a sex therapist" said Linda. "Oh, we could never do that! We'd be too embarrassed!" responded Mary. "But after you go, will you please tell me how it went?" Several weeks passed and they met for lunch again. "So, how did the sex therapy work out, Li [...] |
 
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Joke
by the phantom phucker in Illness and mortality - Therapy - Added: 5 years, 7 months ago - Current Score: 115.2
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My friend has been seeing a shrink. For years he’s had an irrational fear of rope, swaying, Astroturf and heights; it turns out to be from a childhood memory of falling off a swing. This made me think: I wonder where I got my fear of sweets, clowns and fisting. |
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Joke
by Haynz in Illness and mortality - Therapy - Added: 4 years, 6 months ago - Current Score: 27.2
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I had a session with my therapist last night. We both left the pub completely shit-faced. |
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Joke
by emptyhead in Illness and mortality - Alcohol And Drugs (+ 1 more) - Added: 1 year, 1 month ago - Current Score: 23.6
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"I think that one of your problems is that you actually have too much confidence." Said the sexy therapist, who I'd be having sex with later. |
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Joke
by Milo in Illness and mortality - Therapy - Added: 2 months, 22 days ago - Current Score: 14.4
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I went to visit a rape therapist today. Halfway through recounting my rape in graphic detail, the therapist looked visibly shocked and had to tell me to stop. Imagine how silly I felt when he told me he was only there for rape victims. |
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My therapist says I have a preoccupation with vengeance. We'll see about that.. |
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Joke
submitted by guicey47, originally by Stewart Francis in Illness and mortality - Therapy - Added: 10 months ago - Current Score: 4.6
| My next door neighbour's a sex therapist. She bangs on the wall when nothing's happening. |
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Joke
by smegmah in Illness and mortality - Therapy - Added: 3 years, 3 months ago - Current Score: 3.4
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That fat fucker Russell Grant tried to tell my fortune. Didn't believe a word he said............ There's no way he's a medium. |
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Joke
by djando77 in Illness and mortality - Therapy (+ 1 more) - Added: 1 year, 2 months ago - Current Score: 3.2
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My son walked in on me and the wife shagging last night and after being silent all day he finally confronted me. "You've mentally scarred me for life!" He moaned. "Don't worry lad" I said, reassuringly. "You'll think back and laugh about it one day, with your therapist." |
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After a few months of therapy, I think I've finally resolved my unconscious issues about sex.
For example, one time this girl offered me "hand relief": I thought she said "andry leaf", and I spent the rest of the evening wondering what the fuck "andry leaf" was. Never did get the hand job. Another time, a girl said she wanted to do "Tantric": I thought she said "hand tricks". So instead of mind-blowing, multi-orgasmic sex that laste [...] |
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Joke
by Aga in Illness and mortality - Deafness (+ 2 more) - Added: 3 years, 1 month ago - Current Score: 2.8
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