Jokes under Politics > Benefits
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Give a man a fish, and he can eat for a day. But get him an incapacity benefit form and he can have takeaways every night for life. |
 
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Joke
by Unassigned in Other - Sarcasm (+ 1 more) - Added: 1 year, 3 months ago - Current Score: 262.2
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Had to tell the wife I lost my job the other day. She was overjoyed... now we can start planning to have children and have an even greater income. |
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| Got to be weird being a British Paralympian under this government, knowing that a medal means you'll lose your Disability Living Allowance. |
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| A child is for life, not just for benefits! |
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Many Olympic athletes from minor countries say coming to Great Britain is a dream come true. They've obviously heard how easy it is to get a council house. |
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I hate when people treat benefit claimers unfairly, I once heard this posh women ranting: "They don't even try looking for a job, they just sit on their arses being paid more than someone who has a job, in their free house which I pay for with MY taxes, it's like Christmas for them!" she shouted. I couldn't listen any more so I stood up, "That's completely untrue!" I shouted at her, "most of them don't even celebrate Christmas..." |
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My mate Bernard faked an epileptic seizure in the dole office, so he'd qualify for Disability Living Allowance. It was Benny fit fraud. |
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Joke
by 8 ace in Illness and mortality - Epilepsy (+ 1 more) - Added: 6 months ago - Current Score: 21
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The pot noodle.. For when piercing a film lid is too much cooking for you. |
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What do you call a deaf and blind man with no arms and legs? Fit to work. |
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| How to confuse a chav on The Jeremy Kyle show twice with one question, What does your dad do? |
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