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Jokes under Sex and shit > Fatties

1210698
I said to this fat bird in the pub last night, "You've got the girl next door look."

She winked and said, "Do you find that look attractive?"

I said, "Not really, my neighbour's got Downs Syndrome."
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Joke by stash in Illness and mortality - Down's Syndrome (+ 1 more) - Added: 1 year, 4 months ago - Current Score: 261.8


1464703
This morning my wife said, "I find these post-it note jokes of yours about my weight problem really distasteful."

"You're not supposed to eat them love," I replied.
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Joke by irbaboon in Sex and shit - Fatties - Added: 3 weeks ago - Current Score: 247.8




1211641
I said to my doctor, "I've only got a small penis, can you recommend anything?"

He said, "Try a fat lass, they're not usually that fussy."
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Joke by stash in Sex and shit - Penis (+ 1 more) - Added: 1 year, 4 months ago - Current Score: 221.8


359379
I saw a girl sat at the bar. "Did you hurt yourself?" I asked.

"When I fell from heaven?" she smiled.

"No you fat cow, you just ate those crisps so fast I thought you lost a finger."
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Joke by drof in Sex and shit - Fatties - Added: 3 years, 2 months ago - Current Score: 200.8


1295479
I was stood at the bus stop with my wife and there was a little kid hanging around, swinging on the railings.

"Show us your cock, fatty!" he shouted.

After a while he said again, "Oi you! The fat bastard with a beard! Show us your cock!"

"Aren't you going to say something to him?!" said my wife.

"Me? " I said, "I thought he was talking to you."
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Joke by drof in Sex and shit - Fatties - Added: 1 year ago - Current Score: 174.6


1353630
If there's enough room to spell "BOOTYLICIOUS" on the back of your shorts,
It probably isn't.
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Joke submitted by fullofballshit, originally by someecards.com in Sex and shit - Fatties - Added: 8 months ago - Current Score: 142.4


1151800
Some fat girl slobbered up to me in the pub, grabbed me and said "I want you inside me.. now!"

"Fuck off" I said. "If you're hungry, get some crisps."
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Joke by drof in Sex and shit - Women (+ 1 more) - Added: 1 year, 6 months ago - Current Score: 140.8


1322206
Fat women are like farts.

Yeah, sure, I do them. But if someone asks me if I did. I always deny it.
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Joke by Scottabignob in Illness and mortality - Obesity (+ 2 more) - Added: 10 months ago - Current Score: 136.8


1351317
You can say what you like about fat birds.

They'll still let you fuck them.
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Joke by stash in Sex and shit - Fatties - Added: 8 months ago - Current Score: 110.2


1401921
I like my women the way I like my Kit Kat.

I'd rather four thin ones than one chunky one.
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Joke by squirrelorgans12 in Sex and shit - ??? General (+ 1 more) - Added: 5 months ago - Current Score: 108.8



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