Jokes under Other > Surreal
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I'd hate to be a dragon. I'd get so angry trying to blow out my birthday candles. |
 
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I saw some tightrope walkers the other day. What a weird flavour for a packet of crisps. |
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Joke
by simonlomas in Other - Wordplay (+ 2 more) - Added: 2 years, 4 months ago - Current Score: 347.6
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The other day, I was having a shit in the woods when, to my horror, some passers-by saw me. Thankfully, I was wearing my bear costume. |
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I swear I saw the Loch Ness monster on holiday last week, but my friends think I'm fucking crazy. Well, why shouldn't it have a holiday like the rest of us? |
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I've just been winding my watch up. I joked about it having 3 hands. |
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I could never kill a spider in the bath. I wait till his guard's down and he's blow-drying his hair afterwards. |
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I looked at myself in the mirror this morning, took a deep breath and said: "Don't forget. You're a tiger. You're a tiger. You're a tiger." Then I mauled my daughter, pissed on the sofa and left the house to hunt antelope. |
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Every day when I was a child, my mum would say "I've made your bed up again." She had a great imagination, but I hated sleeping on the floor. |
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| What if oxygen makes your voice deeper and helium makes it normal? |
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I proudly told my girlfriend about all the jokes I posted about her on the internet. She replied "I'm made up" |
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