Jokes under Illness and mortality > Paralysis
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I knocked at my neighbour's door today. "Your son has just run out in front of my car," I snapped. "I nearly killed him." "I'm so sorry," she gasped. "He won't be doing it again." "I know he won't," I replied. "The paramedic said that he was probably paralysed." |
 
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Joke
by Unassigned in Illness and mortality - Hospital (+ 2 more) - Added: 1 year, 7 months ago - Current Score: 670.6
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Emmerdale's been rapped for having a plot that was 'hurtful' to people with paralysis. I thought paralysis meant you couldn't feel anything. |
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Joke
submitted by crustygit, originally by jimmy carr in Illness and mortality - Paralysis - Added: 1 year, 11 months ago - Current Score: 253.8
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I sat my 8 year old son at the dining table and placed a bowl of sweets in front of him. I then left the room for 5 minutes as a test to see if he would scoff the lot. When I returned, he was crying, but he hadn't touched one sweet. He had passed the test. He's definitely paralysed from the neck down. |
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Joke
by Biscuit777 in Illness and mortality - Paralysis - Added: 1 year, 1 month ago - Current Score: 239.4
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When the doctor told me that the accident had left me paralysed from the neck down, it sent shivers down my spine. I think. |
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Joke
by It's a SHIT DEMON! in Illness and mortality - Paralysis - Added: 1 year, 5 months ago - Current Score: 231.2
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My son wants to join a local rugby team, so this Christmas he asked for a pair of Adidas boots. I said, "I'm not buying you them. My brother got paralysed playing rugby when he was your age... You can just have his old pair." |
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My girlfriend has a reputation for being an easy shag. But to be fair, it's only since she's been in that coma..... |
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Fuck Usain Bolt - my cousin did the 100 meters in under eight seconds and he's disabled. Although he did die at the bottom of the hill, so it was a hollow victory. |
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I'll tell you someone who won't be moving during this transfer market deadline day. My paralysed grandma. |
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Joke
by sick.fucker in Illness and mortality - Paralysis - Added: 1 year, 9 months ago - Current Score: 45.2
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Have you heard about that new charity which gives people in wheelchairs the opportunity to experience rock climbing? Brokeback Mountain |
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Joke
by jamesflood in Illness and mortality - Paralysis - Added: 1 year, 5 months ago - Current Score: 33.2
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What's funnier than watching a dog chase its tail? Watching a paraplegic chase his dreams. |
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Joke
by grunge94 in Illness and mortality - Disability (+ 2 more) - Added: 3 years, 8 months ago - Current Score: 26.2
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