Jokes under Sex and shit > Incest
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I'm Josef Fritzl and no windows was my idea. |
 
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Joke
by andicap in Sex and shit - Incest (+ 1 more) - Added: 3 years, 6 months ago - Current Score: 6,742.8
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I was working late at the Carphone Warehouse last night when I received this text from my daughter: 'Dad,thespacebuttonisfaultyonthisphone. Whenyougethomepleasegivemeanalternative.' And as I eagerly rushed home, I couldn't help but wonder... What the hell does 'ternative' mean? |
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Joke
by pissingonviKINGS in Sex and shit - Incest (+ 1 more) - Added: 2 years, 11 months ago - Current Score: 3,688.2
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My daughter has reached that age where she is asking embarrassing questions about sex. Just this morning she asked, "Is that the best you can do?" |
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Joke
by bawbag in Sex and shit - Incest (+ 1 more) - Added: 4 years, 7 months ago - Current Score: 3,459.8
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It's so awkward when you send a private text message to the wrong person. The other day I wrote a message, "Hey babe, thinking of U makes my cock hard, can't wait to sex U up 2night" and sent it to my 10-year-old daughter. Imagine how embarrassing it would have been if I'd sent that to the wrong person. |
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Joke
by phibsboro in Sex and shit - Incest (+ 1 more) - Added: 2 years, 10 months ago - Current Score: 2,251
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Little Johnny is in the bath with his Dad when he says, "Daddy, why is my willy different from yours?" His Dad replies, "Well, for a start, son, yours isn't erect." |
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Joke
by Bheroniphr in Sex and shit - Incest - Added: 5 years, 11 months ago - Current Score: 2,054.2
| I think judging from experience - the worst possible thing in life is wanking off to a porn film, your mum walking in and you quickly changing the tab to Facebook not realising your 14 year old sister's "Beach Holiday" album is open. |
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Joke
by razbrazz in Sex and shit - Incest (+ 1 more) - Added: 3 years, 6 months ago - Current Score: 1,998.4
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My wife just said, "It's your turn next, what do you want for Father's Day?" "A blowjob" I replied. "Ha-ha, but what do you want from your daughter?" I am sick to death of repeating myself to that woman. |
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One morning my hot 15 year-old sister came into my room crying. Dad had finally told her that her real parents were unknown - she was adopted.
I was a good big brother. I put a comforting arm around her, and told her that it doesn't matter, that we'll always love her, and that I thought she was the most wonderful sister in the world. Then, I dunno how it happened, but we kissed, and soon things got really passionate - clothes came off, and... we had the most amazing sex. [...] |
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Joke
by storyteller in Sex and shit - Incest (+ 2 more) - Added: 3 years, 8 months ago - Current Score: 1,793.8
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Austrian authorities have said that Josef Fritzl has been improving as a father as of late. In fact, police are reported to have said that he has "been coming into his own". |
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Joke
by BushTurkey in Sex and shit - Incest (+ 1 more) - Added: 5 years, 2 months ago - Current Score: 1,768.4
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Little Johnny walks into his parents bedroom to find his Dad giving his Mum one. His Dad smirks and throws a pillow at the door saying, "Get outta here, you little shit!" A couple of hours later Dad hears a whole lot of commotion coming from little Johnny's bedroom. He goes up to find little Johnny giving his Grandma a right royal seeing to. Little Johnny smiles, "It's not so fucking funny when it's YOUR mum, is it?" |
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