Jokes under Crime > Murder
"I've got a new nickname for you," I told my wife today.
"What is it?" she asked.
"Bambi," I replied.
"Aww, is that 'cos I've got beautiful eyes?" she asked.
"No, it's because I've just killed your mum," I replied.
|My son will soon be getting to that age where he acts like my cat. He'll start bringing birds home in such poor condition I'll have to take them into the backyard and kill them with a brick.|
I went out into the garden and, to my horror, my wife was slumped on the grass.
The fucking dog had dug her up again.
In the news; "Woman arrested for killing her kids whilst on holiday in Spain".
Silly bitch should have gone to Portugal, she would have got away with it there.
BBC News: Jo Yeates' body was missing sock
How on Earth did the police mistake a discarded sock for a human body?
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