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Apparently when you spend £5 on a coffee in Costa you get a free mug. Just stop by the nearest mirror to see it. |
 
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My wife gave me a leaflet about anger management last week... I lost it. |
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I've just seen a sign in the post office that said "Stamps sold by the book". It's good to know that someone follows the rules. |
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| Just read a really sad story about how blind people get used to new surroundings... Touching stuff. |
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"Scientists reveal there are fewer than one hundred adult cod in the whole North Sea." Clearly the Cod population has taken a battering... |
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I've just done 100 press-ups in a row... The lift attendant looked pretty annoyed. |
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| On a lighter note, I just tied a letter to a helium balloon. |
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My girlfriend is well pumped up for sex tonight... I might have to pump her up some more though, I think she's got a slow puncture. |
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| The key to breaking into someone's house is unfortunately usually already in the house. |
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Why is everyone complaining about the cost of living going up? It's still a free channel on my freeview box. |
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