Jokes under Sex and shit > Pregnancy
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My 16 year-old girlfriend's parents were round for dinner last night, after trying her brilliant cooking they asked her what her secret was. Perfect time to tell them she's pregnant. |
 
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Joke
by alimalekalimalekalimalek in Sex and shit - Pregnancy - Added: 3 years, 0 months ago - Current Score: 1,831.8
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One morning my hot 15 year-old sister came into my room crying. Dad had finally told her that her real parents were unknown - she was adopted.
I was a good big brother. I put a comforting arm around her, and told her that it doesn't matter, that we'll always love her, and that I thought she was the most wonderful sister in the world. Then, I dunno how it happened, but we kissed, and soon things got really passionate - clothes came off, and... we had the most amazing sex. [...] |
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Joke
by storyteller in Sex and shit - Incest (+ 2 more) - Added: 3 years, 7 months ago - Current Score: 1,791.8
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Putting a pin through all of my best friends condoms seemed like a good idea at the time. Backfired though when I found out my wife is pregnant. |
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I have an idea to lower teenage pregnancy rates in the UK. Replace the current sex education in our schools with porn. It would mean the girls would accept anal as the norm and the boys would know to pull out and come on the girl's tits. |
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Joke
submitted by ferret, originally by 'Jim Jeffries'. in Sex and shit - Pregnancy - Added: 4 years, 4 months ago - Current Score: 1,135.2
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I used to think I was trapped in a woman's body... Then I was born. |
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Joke
submitted by buzz-lightyear, originally by Chris Bliss in Sex and shit - Pregnancy - Added: 5 years, 0 months ago - Current Score: 1,018
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They say so many people die because of alcohol... Perhaps they never realised how many of them are born because of it. |
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My wife rang to say she's just gone into labour. I told her it was bloody ridiculous to start a career in politics when we're expecting a baby. |
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Joke
by sickfast in Sex and shit - Pregnancy (+ 1 more) - Added: 3 years, 7 months ago - Current Score: 730.2
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The wife just told me that she's pregnant and expecting twins at Christmas. She's going to make a fantastic single mum. |
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Joke
by mzzzzagrl in Sex and shit - Pregnancy (+ 1 more) - Added: 2 years, 0 months ago - Current Score: 699.6
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Yahoo news carries the headline 'Baby born to woman in coma'. All these years women have been claiming that childbirth is the most difficult and painful thing in the world. Turns out that you can do it in your sleep. |
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Joke
by spiritleader in Sex and shit - Women (+ 1 more) - Added: 3 years, 7 months ago - Current Score: 691.8
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My girlfriend showed me a pregnancy test she took last night, and the result was positive. I said, "Should we keep it?" "No point" she replied, "You can only use them once." |
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Joke
by MICK THE MAG in Sex and shit - Pregnancy - Added: 3 years, 9 months ago - Current Score: 561
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