Jokes under Religion > Mormon
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Apparently masturbation is good for you -- really, it is! Sexual relief releases a chemical which stimulates the brain, and in effect is a natural anti-depressant. Scientific researchers reckon that if a person were to masturbate every two hours, he would never feel depressed. So, that got me thinking... Mormons are always really happy, upbeat, and jolly people. This tends to prove what we have known all along: they are all a bunch of wankers. |
 
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What do you get if you remove an 'm' from Mormon? A tautology. |
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When I was younger, I thought Mormons were lucky because of that multiple wife thing. I thought it must be great to have as many sexy wives as they wanted. Then I got married, and now I just feel sorry for the cunts. |
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There is a new online advert, for the Church of Latter Day Saints, that simply says on the banner "Click to chat with a Mormon." Anyway, I thought, "why not? I'll give it a try," and I ended up talking to this very cultured, friendly and thoughtful 19 year old student named Erica. Best wank I've had for years. |
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I wonder if Mormon husbands can get wedding rings that say "One ring to rule them all"? |
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Two Americans rang my doorbell earlier today, both clutching the book of Mormon. They told me that they were from the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints and they wanted to come inside my home to pray with me. Nice enough guys - but they were really shit at it. They didn't even know which direction Mecca was in. |
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When people ask what religion I am, I always reply, "Married with kids." Most reply, "Awh, a devoted father and husband?" No, a paedophile mormon. |
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Joke
by sick.fucker in Crime - Paedophilia (+ 1 more) - Added: 2 years, 2 months ago - Current Score: 12.2
| Before the 'Twilight' series, what did 13yr old Mormon girls masturbate to? |
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| If Jesus turned water into wine, why can't mormons drink it? |
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Of all the religious cults, Mormons are my favourites.... ....sorry, I misspelt cunt. |
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