Jokes under In The News > Inflation
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Shhhhhh!!....... Don't tell anyone...... I'm gonna go down on you.... ...And you're gonna love it........... ........But it's only going to be long enough to let you start enjoying it........ ....Then I'm gonna come back up again and fuck you big time..... Lots of love, Petrol prices xx |
 
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Joke
by fuckingliability in In The News - Inflation - Added: 4 years, 10 months ago - Current Score: 2,094.4
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I got a phone call from British Gas to say my bill was outstanding. I said, "Thanks!" |
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Joke
by scotland101 in In The News - Inflation - Added: 4 years, 7 months ago - Current Score: 1,341.6
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I went to the bank today to ask for a loan. "What do you need the money for sir?" "It's for a car." "Oh nice, what are you getting?" "Just some unleaded." |
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I put a hundred quids worth of fuel into my car and then drove off without paying. Unfortunately the police caught me after a short chase. I ran out of petrol half a mile down the road. |
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Joke
by FantasticMrFucks in In The News - Inflation - Added: 1 year, 11 months ago - Current Score: 985.2
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1. Denial 2. Anger 3. Bargaining 4. Depression 5. Acceptance ... The 5 stages of buying petrol. |
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I'm on a quest around the world to find Bigfoot. I'd originally set out to find cheap petrol, but I decided to keep my goals realistic. |
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As the numbers stopped at £19.99 on the pump, I thought, "Just a little squeeze on the handle will leave me having to pay a nice round number." Cashier: "That'll be £31.70, please" |
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BBC News: Rioters throw petrol bomb in Northern Ireland. Christ, they must be loaded! That's like throwing potatoes during the famine. |
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Joke
by daedeyx in In The News - Inflation (+ 1 more) - Added: 1 year, 10 months ago - Current Score: 700
| Cocaine...... Because its cheaper than sniffing petrol |
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What goes from 0-60 in under 3 seconds... A petrol pump. |
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Joke
by runnydundiddy in In The News - Inflation - Added: 1 year, 9 months ago - Current Score: 438.2
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