Jokes under Sex and shit > Kinky
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A Scottish woman walks into her bedroom & finds her husband simulating sex with his wellie. "Hamish!" she shouts "You dirty bastard...Stop fucking aboot!" |
 
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Joke
by lunchy bunsworth in Sex and shit - Kinky - Added: 4 years, 7 months ago - Current Score: 306
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I bought some sexy lingerie to spice things up in the bedroom with my wife. She thought I looked ridiculous in them. |
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My wife brought some ky jelly home and said, "This is going to make you happy tonight!" She was fucking right as well......I spread it all over the door knobs and she couldn't get back in! |
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A Lady goes to the grocers for a cucumber. "Do you want it sliced love?" said the grocer. "What for," says the lady, "it's a fanny I've got, not a fuckin slot machine!" |
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How sick am I? I ended up shagging my gran last night Today I’m full of guilt and remorse I’ve vowed it will never, never happen again. In future, that urn is staying well put on the mantelpiece. |
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"Hello class 5T2 I'm your new music teacher, Miss Goddard." "And you have all been very...naughty...little girls." |
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Wanna get laid tonight? Crawl up a chicken's arse and wait. |
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I was talking to this girl in a club and the conversation moved on to the tattoos she had on either leg. She told me: 'One's for when I'm a good girl, and one's for when I'm a bad girl...' To be honest I was looking for something inbetween the two. |
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Joke
submitted by ThatOneKid, originally by The Banker (Deal or No Deal) in Sex and shit - Kinky - Added: 2 years, 7 months ago - Current Score: 34.6
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I said to my nympho girlfriend, "Your fanny's like a bucket." "That's not very nice," she replied. "What makes you say that?" I said, "There's a mop in it." |
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In school we were taught "Treat others the way you want to be treated" What a load of shit. At least five of the girls pressed charges. |
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