Jokes under Crime > Neglect
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I hadn't heard from my son for a couple of days, so I decided to go and see how he was. Turns out he just needed a new battery for his baby monitor. |
 
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I took the kids to the circus last night. It shouldn't take long for them to settle in. |
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I'll be dropping off a few surprises at the orphanage this Christmas. The kids. |
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The police have charged me with negligence after my 3yr old plummeted from our tenth floor balcony. Who's to say it wasn't suicide!? |
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"Don't you just hate it when you sniff loads of cocaine and then forget where you leave things?" "No!" my wife said with a look of disgust, "Now where the fuck are our children?" |
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Joke
by jack the gripper in Crime - Drugs (+ 1 more) - Added: 4 months, 30 days ago - Current Score: 8.4
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I hate it when I go into a room and then forget why I went there in the first place. Then I remember 10 minutes later that I'm a fireman and everyone in that room just burnt to death. |
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For Years I Thought I Was Born On February 30th But It Was Just My Parents Getting Out Of Buying Me Presents |
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I've just found my girlfriend dead under our sunbed. I think I'll just leave her there for a few days to save on cremation fees. |
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I'm a smackhead and have been branded an 'unfit mother' to my 3 young children. So when the social took my kids away from me I was absolutely gutted. I felt such a deep sense of loss and I still don't know how I'm going to cope... I was earning 150 quid a week in Child Tax Credits for keeping those children and now I'm skint as fuck! |
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I lost one of my kids during a stroll round the park, In hindsight, safari parks aren't safe for walking round. |
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