Jokes under Other > Envy
| Lads, does anyone else find it really annoying when you go to the urinals and the end of your penis gets covered in piss at the bottom of the urinal? |
 
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I was sitting outside a cafe yesterday when I noticed this homeless fella eyeing up what was left of my cake. 'Are you going to eat that?' he asked anxiously. 'Do you want it?' I replied. 'Yes please.' 'Well in that case,' I answered, 'Yes I am going to eat it.' |
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My girlfriend gets really jealous. She can't even stand seeing me talk to my wife. |
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I used to think I was poor because I couldn't afford shoes. Then I saw a man with no feet. Then I realised he didn't have to spend money on shoes and hated the cunt. |
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The famous American multi-millionaire Randolph Pubick II has three children. They are known collectively as the Pubick heirs. |
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After twenty years I decided to track down my three best friends from school. I was shocked at what they had become. Dave is an alcoholic who hasn't worked since 2004. Ben is in prison for robbery. However it was when I saw Tim that I felt sick to my stomach. He's got a fantastic job and a really attractive wife. |
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| When I found two generous E's in my exam results today, I was a bit disappointed, but once I took them, my results were looking a lot better. |
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A woman stumbles into A&E and in a last gasp whispers to the Doctor "Please make me better" She woke up 3 months later as a Man! |
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Joke
by Season4 in Sex and shit - Feminists (+ 1 more) - Added: 2 years, 5 months ago - Current Score: 5.2
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I was away working abroad with my mate when he decided to text his wife: 'my beautiful darling wife, missing you so much x' 'aw that's where I want to be in a few years time when I find someone' I said 'what texting your beautiful darling wife as well?' 'nope' I replied 'fucked off in some other country away from her' |
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Joke
by port-joker in Sex and shit - Wife (+ 1 more) - Added: 1 year, 6 months ago - Current Score: 4.2
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This kid at my nephews big birthday party just shit his pants and got to go home. I'm seriously considering this option. |
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