Jokes under Crime > ASBO
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I was walking down the road yesterday evening when I met a gang of hoodies. One of the big black teenagers waved his arms like Ali G and said to me, "Dis is our 'hood and these are our streets, innit." Apparently, "If these are your streets then fix those potholes, you lazy nigger," was the wrong reply. |
 
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Just realised why Chavs litter... So their dads still have jobs |
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| I saw a shoplifter walking out of the paki shop today with a pack of bacon, as he walked out of the door Ali shouted "Oy, what do you think your doing with that"? "Eggs, beans and sausages you black cunt" said the shoplifter. |
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Joke
by sickusmaximus in Other - Professions (+ 2 more) - Added: 3 years, 10 months ago - Current Score: 118.6
| It's bonfire night tonight, or as I like to call it in Liverpool 'natural selection evening'. |
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Joke
by Brooksyy in Events - November 5th - Bonfire Night (+ 1 more) - Added: 6 months ago - Current Score: 85.8
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So the government have announced the replacement of the Anti-Social Behaviour Orders - ASBOs. I'm sure the new Criminal Under New Tagging System will be a great success. |
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Joke
by cookingfunny in Politics - Government (+ 1 more) - Added: 2 years, 3 months ago - Current Score: 77
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I got arrested for being drunk and disorderly last night and the officer told me: "I've already notified your wife sir" "And what did she say?" "Nothing" "Bollocks, that's not my wife" |
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Why did the chav cross the road? To happy slap the chicken. |
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So anti-social behaviour is the result of violent computer games, is it? Bollocks... If all these little hoodie-wearing, acne-covered, chain-smoking, swaggering cunts were at home playing computer games my wife wouldn't have been stabbed and raped, would she? At least until I got home. |
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Got caught sniffing Tipp-Ex the other day. I've been admitted to a correction centre. |
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The exam boards have recently released a set of exams which enable chavs to get some qualifications based on their real-life experience:
1. Terry nicks 15 stotties and 9 tins of Special Brew from Somerfield. a. How mint will Terry's night be? (2)* b. How long until the busies catch him?** (2) c. How gay are the busies on a scale of 1 to 10?*** (2) *1 mark awarded for use of 'buzzin' **'Ah divven naah' is a [...] |
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