Jokes under Crime > Animal Cruelty
As I put my fork into the lamb, I was shocked at how much blood came out.
"This isn't cooked properly!" I shouted.
"Get the fuck off my land!" replied the farmer.
The first present I opened this Christmas was a pen knife. I was so excited, I used it to cut open all my other presents.
Shame about the puppy.
|Supermarkets are only there so you buy things you don't need. For example, during the summer heatwave, I bought 8 cans of dog food. When I got back to my car, however, I discovered I didn't need it.|
My dog does a somersault everytime Man Utd score a goal.
Sometimes he does two somersaults, it depends how hard I kick him.
|I've just discovered my dog has a latex allergy. God knows how I'm going to explain that to the vet.|
For thousands of years, human beings have milked cows and consumed the milk.
It just makes you wonder: who actually discovered that cows could be milked and what was he TRYING to do?
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