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Jokes under Religion > Jesus

126227
So what if Jesus turned water into wine...I turned a whole student loan into Vodka once. Your move Jesus... I like this! This is poor. Edit this
Joke submitted by johnnymc, originally by Sean Lock in Religion - Jesus - Added: 4 years, 0 months ago - Current Score: 4,479.8


7176
Jesus said to Peter, "Come forth and I will give you eternal glory."
Peter came fifth and won a toaster.
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Joke by litlmiznice in Religion - Jesus - Added: 5 years, 7 months ago - Current Score: 1,479




10574
Christmas is shit. Whoever invented it should be nailed to a cross. I like this! This is poor. Edit this
Joke by hacienda88 in Religion - Jesus - Added: 5 years, 6 months ago - Current Score: 1,196


58380
There were 3 good arguments that Jesus was Black:
1. He called everyone brother
2. He liked Gospel
3. He didn't get a fair trial

But then there were 3 equally good arguments that Jesus was Jewish:
1. He went into His Father's business
2. He lived at home until he was 33
3. He was sure his Mother was a virgin and his Mother
was sure He was God

But then there were 3 equally good arguments that Jesus was Italian: [...]

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Joke by CornishJon in Religion - Jesus - Added: 4 years, 7 months ago - Current Score: 1,149


39758
You thought you had lag?

It took Jesus 3 days to respawn.
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Joke by Zap in Religion - Jesus - Added: 4 years, 10 months ago - Current Score: 1,076.6


518069
On Sunday, a user posted the joke "Jesus"...which was quickly buried...It's been 3 days, has anyone seen it? I like this! This is poor. Edit this
Joke by joebloggs in Religion - Jesus - Added: 2 years, 10 months ago - Current Score: 951.4


558309
Mohammed spent a lot of time up mountains, slaying goats and raping children,

Jesus spent a lot of time around the docks and managed to feed the 5000 on fish.

And that, people, is the difference between gross prophet and net prophet.
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Joke by SteDe in Religion - Jesus - Added: 2 years, 10 months ago - Current Score: 898.4


59047
Jesus walks into a bar and asks for a glass of water which he then turns into wine.
The barman says, "Oy, what do you think you are doing?"
Jesus replies, "I'm not paying your fucking prices."
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Joke by Baldlice in Religion - Jesus - Added: 4 years, 7 months ago - Current Score: 876


719032
I don't understand why Christians are against gay marriage.
Jesus had two dads, he turned out alright.
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Joke by daddyissues in Religion - Jesus - Added: 2 years, 6 months ago - Current Score: 857.4


44491
If Jesus died for our sins...

Then if we don't sin, surely he died for nothing...

Fuck the confessional, people, get out there and rape things!
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Joke by charlieeee in Religion - Jesus - Added: 4 years, 9 months ago - Current Score: 834.2



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