Jokes under Crime > Arson
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Hats off to the Icelandic people. First they declared themselves bankrupt... Then they set their island on fire.... Anyone else smell the mother of all insurance frauds? |
 
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Joke
by Azirapheal in Racism - Iceland (+ 2 more) - Added: 3 years, 1 month ago - Current Score: 1,320.6
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The family of an 8 year old boy who burned to death in an arson attack have issued a statement, saying that they are devastated at their loss. I know the feeling, I burnt my toast this morning. |
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Joke
by boroboy in Illness and mortality - Burns (+ 1 more) - Added: 3 years, 7 months ago - Current Score: 1,048.8
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I put in a complaint about my neighbours last night. I was trying to get to sleep and they were shouting, screaming, banging on the windows, then to top it all their fucking smoke alarm started going off. Anyway I think it worked, I haven't heard a peep from them today. |
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Joke
by marc58 in Illness and mortality - Burns (+ 1 more) - Added: 3 years, 6 months ago - Current Score: 430.4
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My budgie broke his leg so I used a couple of matches as a splint. Unfortunately, I'd also lined his cage with sandpaper. |
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Joke
by Quadraplegicyetstilltyping in Crime - Arson - Added: 3 years, 2 months ago - Current Score: 420.6
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I accidentally put diesel instead of petrol in my ex-girlfriend's car. It was a nightmare getting it to light. |
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I just love the smell of Grannies cooking. And that's why I torched the old peoples' home. |
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I saw on the news the other day that there had been a fire at the homeless shelter and it burned down. I thought: "What are they NOW... homelesser?!" I'm joking! ...They were trapped inside, they're all dead. |
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Joke
submitted by marky_77, originally by Jimmy Carr in Crime - Arson - Added: 3 years, 3 months ago - Current Score: 349
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When I found out my wife of 3 years had been cheating on me with my brother I took everything she owned into the back garden, and set fire to it. Shame about the puppy... And her 8 year old son. |
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Joke
by sick.fucker in Crime - Child Abuse (+ 2 more) - Added: 2 years, 5 months ago - Current Score: 323.8
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My brother has just set fire to one of my Mr Men books. No more Mr Nice Guy. |
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Joke
by bumblesquash in Other - Books (+ 1 more) - Added: 1 year, 2 months ago - Current Score: 278.8
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Ironically, my flat on Tottenham High Road now resembles the cunts who torched it. Black, vacant and completely fucking useless. |
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