Jokes under Sex and shit > Penis
| If size doesn't matter, how come my girlfriend's vibrator isn't three inches and crooked? |
 
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I accidentally sent a picture of my dick to everyone in my address book today. Not only was it really embarrassing, it cost me a fortune in stamps. |
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Joke
submitted by Jokemon, originally by Gary Delaney in Sex and shit - Penis (+ 1 more) - Added: 3 years, 6 months ago - Current Score: 2,251.4
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Have you heard the joke about my penis? I won't bother telling you, it's too long. |
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Joke
by MattMcDermott in Sex and shit - Penis - Added: 3 years, 10 months ago - Current Score: 1,946.8
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Max Factor mascara makes eyelashes appear three times longer? Max Factor should make condoms. |
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Three gay men are in an internet chatroom bragging about the size of their dicks.
White guy: "My dick is so big I have to drop my trousers to take it out" Black guy: "That's nothing, my dick is so big I can turn my monitor on and off with it while I'm sat in my chair" Indian guy: "Well my dick is so big that if I laid it out on my keyboard it would stretch all the way from A-Z." "Wait...shit!" [...] |
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Mummy takes little Johnny to the zoo. As they pass the elephant cage, the elephant has an erection.
"What's that, Mummy?" asks the child. "Nothing, Johnny, nothing," says the embarrassed mother, swiftly leading him on. A week later Johnny's dad takes him and the same happens. "What's that, Daddy?" "That, son, is the elephant's penis." "Mummy said it was nothing." "Your mother's spoiled, S [...] |
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I used to hate P.E at school. I had a pretty big cock and was embarrassed to take the group shower afterward. All the other girls just pointed and laughed. |
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My wife walked out on me after I blew our life savings on a penis extension. She said she just couldn't take it any longer. |
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Joke
by Walter Sobchak. in Sex and shit - Penis - Added: 2 years, 10 months ago - Current Score: 1,206.8
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Herb decided to propose to Sandi , but prior to her acceptance Sandi had to confess to her man about her childhood illness.
She informed Herb that she suffered a disease that left her breasts at the maturity of a 12 year old. He stated that it was OK because he loved her sooo much. However, Herb felt this was also the time for him to open up and admit that he had a deformity too. Herb looked Sandi in the eyes and said... "I too have a problem. My [...] |
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Joke
by Nangleberry Keen in Sex and shit - Penis - Added: 5 years, 6 months ago - Current Score: 981
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A girl was wanking me off the other day when she looked up and said, "My God, you've got an enormous penis!" "You're pulling my leg!" |
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Joke
submitted by Meeks1982, originally by Tommy Cooper in Sex and shit - Penis (+ 1 more) - Added: 4 years, 4 months ago - Current Score: 946.6
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