Jokes under Sex and shit > Dirty Talk
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I met this girl in a night club last night and, as she was leading me away, she said, "I have something to show you, my knickers match my socks." She wasn't wearing any socks. Stupid bitch. |
 
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Joke
by Anomalous in Sex and shit - Dirty Talk - Added: 2 years, 5 months ago - Current Score: 884.4
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Successful chat up line #12 I've got a penis and a knife. One of them is going in you. You choose. |
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| Just had phone sex.. My fucking arse is ringing |
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I was struggling to perform with my new girlfriend so I asked her to talk some filth to me. "Fuck me hard with that tiny cock baby" didn't really help matters. |
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You never know who's listening in on your mobile phone calls... The other day I was talking dirty to my girlfriend on the phone and before I knew it the whole bus was listening. |
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The wife just told me I'm boring in bed. All I asked was if I could penetrate her vagina with my penis to create sufficient friction between our reproductive organs to reach a satisfactory climax. |
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Joke
by wolfmaneman in Sex and shit - Dirty Talk - Added: 1 year, 11 months ago - Current Score: 50.6
| I'm the kind of guy who shouts their own name during an orgasm just to see the reaction of their partner. |
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Joke
by herpityderp in Sex and shit - Dirty Talk - Added: 2 years, 6 months ago - Current Score: 45.8
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I overheard my mum on the phone the other day. "Yeah, we were at it like horny rabbits and he loved to squeeze my tits whilst fucking me up the arse.." "For god's sake mum!" screamed my sister, "Can you just order the fucking pizza?" |
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A newlywed couple had only been married for two weeks. The husband,although very much in love, couldn't wait to go out on the town and party with his old buddies. So, he said to his new wife, "Honey, I'll be right back."
"Where are you going, coochy cooh?" asked the wife. "I'm going to the bar, pretty face. I'm going to have a beer." The wife said, "You want a beer, my love?" She opened the door to the refriger [...] |
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My wife thought she was kinky when she put her finger up my arse last night. Then i fisted her. She will have to go to the dentist tomorrow. |
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Joke
by Xzakly in Crime - Domestic Violence (+ 1 more) - Added: 1 year, 11 months ago - Current Score: 43.2
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